It is way too late for me to be awake. Yet, I am. And for the last 40 minutes I've been laying in the dark with the same thing on my mind and unable to fall asleep. So, I decided to stop trying for a little while. Hopefully by the time I finish this blog I will be sleepy.
So, what's keeping me awake? Well, the past several weeks has been a struggle for me in one of my relationships. Things have just been awkward. Which isn't unusual for me. I am pretty socially awkward and I have a lot of awkward relationships, but not this one. This one never has been, until now. It's nothing bad. Neither one of us is angry or bitter at the other. Something just happened that changed things. But after a few weeks of struggling with trying to figure out how to move forward and what role we will play in each other's lives, God has given me direction tonight. It's funny how when I talk to God and just have an open and honest conversation with Him, that He provides guidance even in things that we aren't talking about at the time, ha. So, now I know how I need to move forward. I know the words to say and the type of friend that I want to be. And that's why I can't sleep. I want to call my friend right now and say what I need to say! And the anticipation of having to wait is keeping me awake. I want so badly to fall asleep and wake up 6 hours later, ah but I am wide awake! haha.
Tomorrow will get here eventually. Hopefully I will have gotten enough rest to coherently create sentences that my friend will understand, haha. :)
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